What Is Friendship?

Friendship is a term that I feel is thrown around way too freely these days. What is commonly referred to as friendship, is more accurately termed acquaintance. I feel there is a definite line between friendship and a mere acquaintance. I have many acquaintances who I feel pretty close to. But in the grand scheme of things, I have very few people in my life that I would term a true friend. I've heard a couple of definitions lately that, when really thought about hold true.

One is, "A friend will help you move. A true friend will help you move a body.".

The other is, "A friend will bail you out of jail. A true friend will be sitting beside you in jail, saying, 'Man, WE screwed up'."

If you really think about the connotations of both of these scenarios, you will find that both are really accurate. In Bill O'Reilly's book, "Who's Looking Out For You?" , Bill makes the statement, "How many people in your life can you name that would bleed for you?" He assesses that if the number is less than five, you need to find a larger net of friendship. Now, I honestly cannot name five people who I think would bleed for me. But I can name a solid three. And maybe four. I know that if everything else in my life was completely gone to shit, there are three people in the entire world who would do whatever it took to make sure that I would be safe and secure no matter what personal sacrifice might befall them.

I would love to say that I knew five people that would do the same, but I honestly cannot make that statement. But I have to say that I feel truly blessed that I have three people (maybe four) I can turn to if my chips are really down. Do I ever want to put these people in this position? HELL NO! I never want to put those who I treasure as my true friends in any kind of danger or personal sacrifice. But there is a certain comfort in knowing that there are at least three people out there, without any kind of blood relationship or sense of some kind of moral obligation, that there are some real people that I can count on when the chips are really down, when you aren't just crying wolf (as all of us do at some time), who if you really need them, would come through for you, no matter what the cost to them. And the other side of that is, I feel sure, they know I would do the same for them. Without question, without hesitation. If those who are closest to me ever need me, they know I will be there.

I feel that is the true definition of friendship. In order to have a friend, you must be a friend. Of course, there are times in all of our lives when our own self interest get in the way of others' best interest. No matter how good a person is, at some point in their life, they will ask, "What's in it for me?" But I do know that there are at least three people in the world that I would bleed for. And those are the same people who would bleed for me. There may be more, but there are at least three who are not my mother or my brother, who I can depend on, who I can turn to, who I can lean on in my times of weakness, and who would do whatever it took to ensure that I have what I need to make it through another day. I sincerely hope that those people know that I would do the same for them.

Does that mean that those people and I always see eye-to-eye? Absolutely not. This is what I value most in them. That we can have our differences and still respect and even love each other. That we can be our own person and still respect each other enough to know, despite our differences, we are there for each other. I want friends who challenge me. I want friends who have the balls to call me an asshole when I need it. And I treasure friends who have my back.

I am truly blessed.

Sorry to be so sappy, as always, I call 'em like I see 'em.

Out.

LoRyder